Leadership 101

Several years ago a friend of mine read a newspaper article about a local couple whose young daughter had been diagnosed with cancer.  The father was out of work and the medical bills were piling up.  Help was needed.

At the time, we were on a recreational flag football team together.  Lying in bed that night, he decided to raise as much money as he could for this family.  He would do it by organizing a flag football tournament.

He brought together a group of several close friends, including myself, to get this done. For the next several weeks, we worked tirelessly to organize this event, calling in many favors along the way.  We secured free fields and referees.  We appeared on a local radio talk show to promote the event.  We got a corporate sponsor.  We created a website.  We printed banners and flyers.  We sought volunteers to help with registration, prizes, parking, and logistics.  We even mowed and lined the fields.

The big day came and the event was perfect.  The Charity Bowl, as we called it, raised $1800.

The next day my friend went over to the family's house.  They had no idea that this event took place when he handed them the check.  My friend said that the combination of pure joy and disbelief in the eyes of both the mother and father was one of the most memorable moments of his life.  $1800 is less than one month's mortgage payment for most.  But to this family, during this time, they said it was like winning the lottery.

A life changing moment for this family.  All because one man chose to make a difference and he convinced others of his goal's purpose.

My friend doesn't sit atop a Fortune 500 company.  He doesn't travel the world making powerful speeches.  He is not wealthy.  But he is a leader.

I'm often asked "What is a leader?" Go outside and find a patch of grass.  Now count the blades.  That's the same number of definitions I've heard over the years around what truly makes a leader. 

For purposes of this blog, I will define a leader as this:  One who ethically and successfully directs people in accomplishing a goal for the common good.

There are no "bad" leaders.  It would be like saying there is a "bad" miracle.  It is inherent that to be considered a leader, you must be effective in getting things done.

Over the last few weeks, I have noticed on Twitter, LinkedIn, and even social conversations with friends a large uptick in the desire for training on leadership basics.  I will chime in with my two cents on this week's blog:  10 Things I Think You Should Think About...Leadership 101. 

While this covers mostly basics, refereshers are never bad.  They allow us to refocus on integral aspects of our job which can increase effectiveness. 

1. Have a strong vision

A few years back, I heard a radio commercial about Erik Weihenmayer, the first blind person to reach the summit of Mount Everest.  At the end of the spot, the announcer said, "It doesn't take sight to reach the top of Mount Everest.  It takes vision."

The same is true of any leader.  Have no vision, nor ability to passionately communicate it, and you might as well throw in the towel.  People need to know, beyond the shadow of a doubt, what you want done. What is the uniting, rallying cry for the cause?

Many people confuse the difference between a mission and a vision.  A vision is where you are going.  A mission is tactically how you are going to get there.  Therefore, theoretically if you execute on the mission you will eventually achieve the vision.

Being tactical and focusing on execution is certainly important.  But rarely does that fall solely on a leader's shoulders.  A leader can dream big dreams, see things very few can even think. 

Steve Jobs is the ultimate visionary of our generation.  Watch any 80's movie where the main character has a cell phone as big as a Toyota and you'll understand why.  Mr. Jobs saw things others couldn't see yet.  He rallied others around his vision by being able to communicate it so well.  He kept believing even when in the midst of skeptics.  Our technological world will never be the same because of it.

Ok, so we get it.  A vision is important.  But can NOT having a vision destroy a company? 

Actually, it did.

Chances are you have seen the 1990's tv classic Seinfeld.  For much of the series, Elaine works for a clothing company called J. Peterman.  Most people believe this was a fictionalized company, but in fact, J. Peterman is an actual clothing company that began in 1987 by John Peterman.  It filed for bankruptcy in 1999 and was sold to Paul Harris Stores.  (NOTE: The company since has re-emerged and is again owned by Mr. Peterman but is a much different and smaller company than it was in its late 1980's/early 1990's heyday). 

In an article titled the Rise and Fall of the J. Peterman Company by the Harvard Business Review and published in 1999, Mr. Peterman blames much of his company's bankruptcy on his failure to formalize a vision and communicate it to his employees.

He says, "We should have developed a precise mission statement, or something along those lines.  Its easy for me to do that now.  In fact, I can sum up the concept of the business in six words:  Unique, Authentic, Romantic, Journey, Wondrous, and Excellent.  When we strayed from the six words, we faltered.  Toward the end of the company, we were developing 2,000 new products a year.  There is just no way to generate 2,000 products that are truly romantic, unique, and authentic."

A vision is necessary.  But it should not be wordy.  I've seen page-long vision statements.  How is that inspiring?  Who can remember it?  A vision statement should be clear, succinct, and inspiring.

One of my favorite corporate vision statements is from Nike: 

To bring inspiration and innovation to every athlete* in the world.  *If you have a body, you are an athlete.

2.  Teams need visions too

While most would not argue the importance of a clearly communicated, passionate vision, few realize the importance of having one for separate functions or teams within an organization.  Few of us are CEO's.  But that doesn't mean we shouldn't have visions for our teams. 

Every employee must feel engaged and understand how he contributes in making a difference.  Its the "Spirt of the Squirrel" from Ken Blanchard's iconic book Gung Ho.

Determine what is important to your team and what will inspire them to achieve excellence.  Here are a few tips to get you started:

• Aim high.  "If you would hit the mark, you must aim a little above it.  Every arrow that flies feels the attraction of earth." - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
• Be inspirational.  Give your employees something in which they can feel immense pride when achieved.
• Align the vision with broader organizational strategies.  Ensure your function's vision is logically connected, and not in contrast, to the company's overall vision.
• Translate the vision into manageable steps.  This is where a mission and even individual goals become very important.  Always connect the vision to what each individual can do to help the team reach it.
• Get buy-in from your team.  Ensure the team has some say in what the final vision statement is.  This will increase their attachment and desire to achieve it.

3.  Communication

Ever played the telephone game?  It somehow goes from "Mommy likes going to church" to "Grandma shot the mailman."

Without clear communication, one cannot lead.  We discussed above how a vision is useless if not properly communicated.  But it doesn't end with just the vision.  Communication is a core tenet of powerful leadership.

One of the most depressing trends I have witnessed over the past decade is the deteriotion of effective communication.

People will only be moved to action if the desire for that action is explicitly, effectively, and inspirationally delivered.

But not all communication is vocal.  In fact, face to face communication is comprised of three areas:  Visual, Vocal, and Language. How well your message is conveyed is illustrated by the percentages below:

• 55% - Visual/Body Language.  This includes how you dress, your posture, your gestures, your facial expressions.  Captivate your audience by having a strong presence in which they cannot remove their eyes.
• 38% - Tone of Voice.  Very few things in this world are worse than listening to a monotone speaker (all apologies to one of my favorite comedians, Steven Wright).   Be sure to use proper voice inflection and incorporate your enthusiasm into your message. 
• 7% - The actual words.  This may surprise some, but think about it.  If you're audience isn't captivated, it doesn't matter what words you use.  They will fall on deaf ears.  It starts with your presence and your passion.  Then the words begin to make impact.

In case you're wondering, when the message is over the phone, tone of voice comprises 87% of the message and the actual words are 13%.

In addition, a leader always practices the art of over-communication.  Nothing sticks the first time someone hears it or reads about it.  Rely on various touch points, at various intervals, to make your message clear.  Team meetings, email, blogs, 1:1's. 

  

We hear and see a thousand messages every day.  We forget them.  The important ones meant to resonate are discussed repeatedly.

For those who feel you may need help with your communication skills, there are many great organizations and resources. I personally would recommend Toastmasters.  It is a FANTASTIC organization that I have seen firsthand help many, many people become better communicators.

"There is nothing more demoralizing than a leader who can't clearly articulate why we're doing what we're doing." - James Kouzes and Barry Posner

4.  Communication No-No's

Leaders must be held to a higher standard.  Which means publicly berating employees is out of the question.  It might have worked for Mr. Slate in Bedrock, but not anymore.  Never lose your temper in front of others and always settle individual disputes behind closed doors.

E-mail brings great value to our fast paced, technology-savvy society.  But it can also be a crutch.  For information-only purposes, or to reinforce a previous message, by all means use e-mail.  But when the message is vital to success, a leader will communicate verbally.  Phones are not only cameras, web browsers, and twitter vehicles.  Believe it or not, they actually still work for talking to people.  Use them.

Don't go CC:razy.  Only cc: someone if they absolutely need to know the information.  Likewise, be careful when "replying to all".

When written communication is needed, please remember spellcheck is not a wonder drug.  Proofread before sending.  Mistakes will happen, but poorly written communications look lackadaisical and they inspire very few.

Obey the Sundown rule.  I realize this can be difficult at times, but imagine the impact it has on others around you.  The Sundown rule is a basic understanding that you will return any email or voicemail you receive by the end of the day.  This does NOT mean you will have all the answers by then, but you're simply letting the person know you received their message.  If it is not a simple answer, this behavior at least allows you to set proper expecations as to when you will have the information he is requesting.  

5.  Gain trust
Someone once told me "Trust is alot like a bank account.  It takes many years to build up and just minutes to spend."

A leader understands he needs others to get things done.  Others will not follow your lead if they do not trust you. 

There are three main pillars of gaining trust:

1. Honesty.  Never lie.  If you can't divulge all the facts, simply explain that.  Always be candid, but prudent.  Sugarcoating NEVER yields long-term changes or results.

2. Competency.  Try to be the best at what you do.  Don't confuse this with actually being the best (there will always be only one of those).  People are more likely to trust you if they believe you have expertise in your area and are constantly trying to get better.  I am amazed at how many people within organizations, as they move up in their careers, stop trying to learn.  The world passes you by quickly if you take that thought.  Continue to read.  Network.  Be involved with organizations.  Sharpen that axe at every opportunity and an atmosphere of continual learning will permeate across your employees.

3.  Dependability.  Do you subscribe to the thought "Do as I say not as I do?"  Big mistake.  Yes, its a cliche but you MUST lead by example.  If you want people there at 7 am, be there at 6:30.  If you want people to proofread emails, be sure yours are perfect. 

If you set an expectation or commit to getting something done, be sure to deliver.  Be respectful of their time as you would expect of yours.  Never gossip.

6.  Facilitate Change

A leader gets things done.  He lays out where the team is headed (vision), the strategy to achieve it, and then begins execution.  Unfortunately, this may be where you start to lose some people.  It is human nature to resist change.  Some take it better than others, but no two people react to it quite the same.

There are five main categories most people fall into based on their reactions to change:

1) Disengaged
The Disengaged person is very quiet and only performs basic requirements as a result of the new change.  He uses phrases like "I'll just do my job" or "It won't affect me."   Be direct with this person. 

Ever been on an airplane when instructions are given on what to do if a crash is imminent?  We have all heard them many times, but rarely listened. Now, have you ever been on an airplane when they tell you to assume crash position?  I have.  And boy was I wishing I had paid closer attention to those instructions.

The disengaged person needs to understand the consequences if he chooses not to buy into the change.

2) Disidentified
The Disidentified person reminisces about the "good old days" and continues to do it the "old" way.  He says things like "It was already working fine for me."

Allow this person to become involved with the change if possible so he feels a sense of ownership.  Ask what was great about the "old" way and explain how the same type of positive experience can still be achieved in the new way.

3) Disoriented
The Disoriented person worries excessively, asks alot of questions, and can get lost in analysis paralysis.  Asks questions such as, "Now what am I supposed to do?" and "What do I do first?"

Explain to this person very clearly and logically how the change is part of the overall vision and how he will ultimately fit into the grand scheme.   Provide reassurance and take plenty of time to coach.  Also try to provide this employee with, at least initially, a list of priorities to tackle.

4) Disenchanted
The Disenchanted person is angry and negative, expressing much self-pity.  He typically will enlist others in attempts to sabotage the plans for change.  He can usually suppress the anger when talking directly to you, but causes rumors behind the scenes. 

You must confront this person immediately.  Acknowledge that his anger is normal and allow him to vent his frustrations directly to you.  Then use a firm hand and clearly state your expectations moving forward.  Make it evident that you need his support and more behavior like this will not be tolerated.

5) Friend/Supporter
The Friend is positive and helps to reinforce the change.  He sees the big picture and tends to be more career-oriented. 

One mistake many leaders make is to ignore the Friend because he is not causing issues.  On the contrary, tell him you recognize and appreciate his support.  Look for more ways to involve him in the change initiative.

Change is never easy, but by its very definition it is essential if improvement is to be made in any cause.

7. Innovate

A leader is never content.  He will celebrate a success, but then ask himself, "how can we make it better?"

Steven Johnson created a wonderfully communicated message on innovation and "where good ideas come from."  Its likely you have seen it, but it yields some terrific thoughts to revisit.

I won't add much except to elaborate on a few of Mr. Johnson's points.

First, innovation can only come if you are open to it.  Ideas are all around us.  Stop, look, and capture the ideas.

I get alot of good ideas (my mom told me so).  But as I get older I tend to forget them quite rapidly.  So I now write them down.  I have a notebook dedicated solely to ideas in which I keep near my nightstand.  I also use an app on my iphone to capture them when I am not at home.  The more ideas you get, the more they come together and feed off one another (the "hunch" concept that Mr. Johnson mentions in the video).

As Mr. Johnson explains, many good ideas come from and expand through talking with others.  So collaborate often, whether at work or in social settings.  Always look to strike up conversations, even if with a stranger.  Wallflowers rarely lead.

And finally, read, read, read.  This can be books, magazines, newspapers, blogs, websites, etc...  I start every morning at 5:30 am.  My routine is down pat:  Pour a cup of coffee.  Put on slippers.  Walk outside to retrieve the Wall Street Journal.  Slink down in my favorite chair and begin learning alot.

As the day continues, I keep feeding my brain by reading many online newspaper articles and blogs. 

No matter the type of media you prefer to utilize, the point is the same.  The more information your brain is exposed to, the greater the potential for an idea to incubate.  Take one swing at a pitch and you might miss.  Take 100 and chances are you will get a hit.

8. Coaching

The ongoing decay of coaching within corporate settings saddens me.  Everyone is a "working manager" these days.  I get it.  But part of "working" should be coaching and developing your employees. 

To be a leader, one rule can't be ignored.  Whether you are a CEO or have one direct report, take the time to meet with your employees on a regular basis.  Schedule consistent 1:1 meetings with every member of your team.  And don't cancel or reschedule them.

Use these meetings to learn and develop.  I encourage every leader to have KYB (Know You Better) meetings at least once per year.  In these meetings your purpose is to understand three simple truths:

1. What motivates him?
2. What does he like and what challenges him about his job?
3. What goals does he have for career growth and development?

Some Guidelines for Balanced Coaching:

• Recognize accomplishments
• Provide opportunities for success
• Get to know your people
• Make communication a top priority
• Clearly define goals, but set the standards high
• Provide regular feedback

Occasionally, you may have to deal with a performance issue.  In those cases,

• Be sure to refrain from personal attacks.  Focus on behaviors, not attitudes. 
• Be specific
• Do not sugarcoat. 
• Explain the impact of the issue on the organization and the team. 
• Ask him to devise a solution for solving. 
• Set a timeframe to revisit and monitor closely. 
• Document.

Coaching is improving people to reach their highest potential.  Invest the time now, watch them flourish.

9. Have courage

If leading was easy, there would surely be alot less books and blogs written about it.  Its not easy, and one reason why is that it takes strong conviction and loads of courage.  

 Again, this video is fairly popular and been viewed by many.  But it makes some fantastic points and is worth watching again.

I'm not going to attempt to add much as I think it speaks for itself, but I love his point about the importance of the first follower.  Yes, it takes courage to be the true leader and get out there first with your crazy idea.  But it also takes courage and a leap of faith to be the first follower.  Which begs the question, isn't the first follower a leader in his own right?  Yes.

Believe in something and then act on it.  Shout it from the rooftops.  Don't worry.  Every trip to success has had some embarrassing luggage. 

10.  Help Others

A leader doesn't wait for compliments.  He seeks out ways to pay it forward.  Always be teaching and mentoring.  Be charitable with your time to help develop future leaders (or even the first followers).  Foster the skills in others that have made you the leader you are. Spread your ideas.  The recognition will come.

10.5  Final Thoughts

A brief blog on leadership can't even begin to do the topic justice.  I chose just a few major areas where I see improvement needed.  But there are many, many more and perhaps a future post will hit those in-depth.

As I enter the world of blogging, I am learning so much from so many people who are willing to share their feedback and thoughts.  I would love to hear from you as well.  Let me know your feelings on this blog as well as other topics you think could benefit from a 10 Things post.

Thank you and keep leading the way!

Handling Difficult Customers

If you're breathing, you have had to deal with a difficult person.  The teenager who snarls while swerving past you on the highway.  The disgusted lady behind you in the grocery store sighing loudly while the cashier calls for the third price check.   The soccer dad who won't stop yelling at the 12-year old referee.
While we have all had encounters with difficult people, this undesired dynamic takes on a different level of importance when relating to customer service.  You can simply ignore someone when you're on personal time.  But when your livelihood is at stake, as well as the reputation of your company, the customer demands your attention.

In my earlier years when taking phone calls for a large financial services provider, I was cursed at, hung up on, threatened with a gun, and my personal favorite, told I probably looked like a frog (my wife says I do not).

Sometimes the reason the customer is upset is because your company flat-out messed up.  An order wasn't shipped.  The invoice was wrong.  Somebody provided incorrect information.

Sometimes the customer themselves may have made the mistake.  Maybe that order was shipped but went to a different address the customer originally provided.  Maybe the invoice is correct, the customer just doesn't realize he ordered additional materials.  Maybe the information told to the customer was correct, but he didn't like the answer.

Sometimes the customer is just having a bad day.  And you, my friend, are the lucky one who gets to have an earful.

And sometimes the customer is simply just a jerk.  Some people are born a jerk and will die a jerk.  And giving them great customer service ain't gonna change that.  But we can always dream...

The bottom line is that Cesar Ritz was somewhat confused when the legendary French hotelier uttered those famous words in 1908 - 'Le client n'a jamais tort'.  Those words translate to "The Customer is Never Wrong" which over the years has changed to "The Customer is Always Right".

Um...NOPE!

In fact, the customer is wrong quite frequently.  He may be wrong with his information, or he may be wrong in how he chooses to approach the situation - i.e. yelling at someone he doesn't know.

But, what Mr. Ritz was trying to convey is this simple principle.  Customers are people.  Some will be nice, some won't.  Some you'll like, some you won't. 

But a person becomes a customer because he spends his money with you.  And everyone likes money.  Money is always nice. 

So while customers are frequently wrong, their money never is.  Because of that, anyone wanting to succeed in the world of business must learn how to deal with difficult customers.

Before we move onto this week's 10 Things, let's hop in our time machine and travel back to the 1960's.  Due to the wonder that is YouTube, several months ago I stumbled across a nifty training video that was used by Pan Am Airlines.  It quickly demonstrates the importance of always delivering great customer service, despite the circumstances. 

In the video, the Pan Am employee took his customers for granted and had some trouble listening, which resulted in a lost customer.  Effective listening is our first tip in this week's article: 10 Things I Think You Should Think About...Handling Difficult Customers.

1.  Hearing is not Listening

Our daily communications are comprised of four main vehicles:  Reading, Writing, Speaking, and Listening.  We listen more than any of the others, at a rate of 40% of our daily communications.  While it is likely we all have taken some class in high school or college that helped us read, write, or speak better, very few of us have ever received formal training on how to listen.

If you're feeling a little inadequate in this area, don't fret.  Here are some quick tips:

• Allow the customer to vent.  Don't interrupt so the customer can get everything off his chest.
• Take detailed notes.  Writing down what is said improves content retention rates. The last thing you want to do is ask the customer to have to repeat himself later in the call.
• Pay attention to verbal "cues and clues".  Did the customer say the order is needed for a big presentation next week, but now he is demanding the order be shipped overnight?  Is this necessary?  Everything the customer says, especially when he is frustrated, can help you when providing options later in the conversation. 
• Smile.  The age-old axiom of smiling over the telephone really does work.  When you smile, your body becomes calmer.  Being calm improves your chance of listening effectively.

2.  Paraphrase & Clarify

A few weeks ago on my way home from work I called a local restaurant to place a carryout order.  I am a fairly picky eater and asked for my food to be prepared a special way.  At the end of the call the restaurant employee said, "That will be $14.85 and will be ready in twenty five minutes.  Thanks."  And then he hung up.

Twenty five minutes later I arrived at the restaurant.  Any ideas as to what transpired next?  Yep, that's right - my order was made incorrectly because the employee wrote it down wrong.  So I waited another twenty five minutes while my new dinner was made. 

This mishap could have easily been avoided if the employee had taken ten extra seconds to repeat back to me what he thought he heard.

"Mr. Customer, just to ensure I have it written down correctly let me confirm.  You want the Triple Deluxe Burger with everything on it and a side of sweet potato fries, correct?"

"Actually no.  I want the Double Deluxe Burger, plain, and a side of waffle fries."

"Ok perfect.  Double Deluxe Burger, plain, side of waffle fries.  That will be $13.50 and will be ready in 25 minutes.  Thank you!"

No, thank you.  By investing those 10 seconds, I could have gotten twenty five minutes back.  That's an episode of  the Kardashians.

Paraphrasing is simply repeating back to the customer, in your own words, what you thought you heard.  He will then confirm or correct you.  Either way, you have the right information and can do your job efficiently. 

Clarifying is similar to paraphrasing with a subtle difference. 

While paraphrasing assumes you have the correct information but are asking the customer to confirm, clarifying occurs when you feel you may have wrong information or didn't hear everything correctly.

"Mr. Customer, I believe you mentioned 123 Main Street as the destination but I have 456 Lake Avenue in our computer.  Which address would you like it shipped to?"

Sharks are always hungry.  Don't swim with them.  Similarly, upset customers don't need more reason to be angry.  By paraphrasing and clarifying, you're communicating effectively with the customer and getting much closer to solving their problem.

3.  Don't Argue

We have all seen arguments and disagreements.  The baseball manager, nose to nose with an umpire, kicking dirt and screaming profusely because of a bad call.  A husband and wife disagreeing about how to spend money.  A mother and father having different viewpoints on how to discipline a child. 

Arguments are going to happen in life.  They are unavoidable, natural, and potentially healthy.  But they shouldn't happen with the customer.

An argument only prolongs an uncomfortable conversation.  If the customer is frustrated, arguing with him is not going to change his mind.  He wants to hear that he is right.  Or at least be shown some empathy.  The more we can placate, the easier the call will go.

Recently I was listening to a national sports talk show hosted by Jim Rome.  He was interviewing the commissioner of the NBA, David Stern.  While it may not be seen in the traditional sense, the commissioner is the customer in this scenario.  Without guests, a talk show host has little chance of success.  While it is part of his job to ask challenging, thought-provoking questions, it is also in his best interest to have his guests agree to return in the future. 

Mr. Rome asked a question regarding the recent NBA Draft Lottery and whether or not it was fixed (the NBA currently owns the team, the New Orleans Hornets, who received the #1 draft pick).  Mr. Stern took offense to the question and said "Shame on you" for asking.  Mr. Rome could have easily moved on, but instead took a different route. 

He let his emotions and ego get the best of him.  What transpired was a nearly four-minute, nationally recorded argument between two giants in their respective fields.  There was no winner and the customer probably won't be coming back any time soon.

Just like tangos, arguments always take two.  Abstain from that temptation, and the customer eventually has no choice but to stop.  Remember, the point is to help the customer resolve the situation and bring additional business in the future.

4.  Display Empathy

Right or wrong, the customer is upset for a reason.  We can all relate to that, even if we choose to express it in a different manner. 

"Mr. Customer, I can understand why you're upset.  Let me see how I can help you."

"Mr. Customer, I can see why you would feel that way.  I can assure you I will begin working on this immediately."

While we have all had our spats with friends, it is difficult to be overly obnoxious toward someone we like.  By empathizing with the customer, and putting yourself in his shoes, you draw a connection that makes it much harder for the customer to remain angry.  You are demonstrating through your words and actions that you are trying to help.

5.  Provide Options

Whether its one scoop or two, carpet or wood floors, or 4-cylinder or V6, we all like choices.  It provides us with the feeling we are in control.  We like thinking we have the power to make a decision that will affect us.

It is no different with customer service.  Rather than telling the customer what will occur, try your best to develop at least two scenarios, even if you feel one is not as desirable.  You may not be able to do this in all situations, but you will be surprised at how many times you can provide several choices, even if one is the status quo.

6.  Mutually Agree on Next Steps

This may seem simple, and it usually is.  But it can't be skipped.  Once you provide the customer with options, and he tells you his choice, be sure to confirm the next steps.  This could include time frames, cost, action steps the customer must still take, and a number of other things.  Just be sure both you and the customer are clear as to what will happen next.  You don't want a return call regarding this same issue.

7.  Appreciate

According to the White House Office of Consumer Affairs, 96% of customers are more likely to do business with a company again if a problem was resolved professionally and efficiently.  More interestingly, they are also likely to refer others. 

What this says is that sometimes problems can be our friends.  If we resolve issues in a positive manner (not to be confused with always giving the customer exactly what they demand), we can actually generate more revenue in the future.  That should make sense.  Making mistakes is human nature, and customers realize that too.  How we handle them can shape their future business decisions.

Regardless of how difficult this customer may have been, it is important to genuinely demonstrate your appreciation for their business.  Thank them for their business, their patience, their understanding, their time, or all of the above.

It is six times more expensive to attract new customers than it is to retain existing ones.  So let's be sure to thank them.

8.  Document

The unfortunate truth is that some people, and customers, will take advantage of situations if possible.  We may be more lenient if it is the first time making an exception or resolving an issue.  It is possible for a customer to exploit that fact and continue to bend the rules.  An exception is just that -we don't want it to become a rule. 

Be sure to document your customer conversations, an overview of the problem, and the agreed upon resolution.  This is best kept in a company-wide repository where other customer service associates can view when accessing the customer's account.  Ideally, this would be kept in a CRM.

9.  Escalate if necessary

There may be times when the customer is so belligerent or hostile, you cannot help resolve the issue.  You may be having trouble communicating to the customer, or your personalities might simply clash.  In these times, it is okay to bring onto the line a manager.

Sometimes a new person on the phone will help the customer calm down.  A different set of eyes, void of emotion from the prior conversation, may have a soothing effect on the situation and make it easier to resolve.  You don't want this option to be a crutch, but rather a last-ditch effort to solve the problem.

While it is NEVER appropriate to hang up on a customer, it does make sense in certain situations to pass the baton to a manager.

10.  Move On

When I managed a call center team years ago, I was monitoring a call where a customer was extremely rude to one of my employees.  There was yelling, personal insults, and swearing that would make a sailor blush.  As I started to intervene the customer hung up. 

My employee was so rattled he asked to leave work for the afternoon. 

Two weeks later in a 1:1 with him, he told me he had trouble sleeping for several nights after that call.

Three years later, long after I went to a different company, there was a going-away party for a mutual friend at a bar and this gentleman was in attendance.  I overheard one of his conversations with some past co-workers.  In it, he was still talking about that same call and how it bothered him so much he got out of customer service completely.

Wow! 

I often use the phrase, "Don't let people rent space in your heads."  Do you think the customer thought about that call three minutes later, let alone three years?  While the call may be difficult, and the person may be disrespectful and out of line, he has not earned the right to rent space in your head.

Walk away from your desk, take some deep breaths, go outside for a walk, get a soda.  Take a few minutes to decompress.  And then say a "mental goodbye" to that customer and move on with the rest of your life. 

10.5  Final Thoughts

I can't believe I am actually going to quote Rocky Balboa, but in the final movie of the series Sylvester Stallone delivers an inspirational speech to his son.  In it he says, "It ain't about how hard you can hit.  Its about hard you can get hit and keep moving forward." 

Its inevitable you're going to encounter a difficult customer.  Its not about who wins the "fight".  Its about moving the relationship with the customer forward.  Because customers may not be always right, but having them is.